So, this is a blog.

Hi. I'm EllenofX. That's a calculus joke.

I don't really like calculus that much. It's math, and math is hard, but useful. See, I'm a science person. I like reason, I like patterns, and figuring things out is fun for me. Math is good for finding patterns.

Last year I noticed a pattern of me compromising on my values and either hurting others or myself as a result. The reason I act the ways I do is to protect myself and protect others. Compromising is not an option anymore, and I’m hoping that this blog will help me keep track of my needs and wants, the needs and wants of those around me, and my failures to provide or at least not interfere with my own or others happiness.

This is a blog. It will mostly contain incoherent rambles about my life. You don’t have to read it, and you probably shouldn’t.  It’s just another self obsessed sector of the internet. There are a lot of much more entertaining ones, like Hyperboleandahalf – you can find her blog over here: http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/. I’m viewing this blog as someplace where I can make my own contract with society, since I feel I need one.

I am not a psychopath, but there is some very minor evidence that I might be a sociopath. I’m still doing research on the topic… I find it rather unlikely. Having a mental illness seems a bit to normal for me, if that makes sense. I want to impose rules to myself because I want to be consistent, so that if anybody wants to, they can find my pattern.

I want to find my pattern.

Thanks for reading. I appreciate it, Society. I hope you have a wonderful day, and if you drive, drive safely.

Bye,

~`Ellen